We Hate Tuesdays (and Wednesdays)!

Yesterday started out wonderful. We got up early so that we could stop for bagels on our way downtown. We laughed a lot on the drive and talked about things we're going to do with our sweet little girl as she grows.


Our first appointment was with the OB. Everything went well. No protein again! Of course Shelly's very happy there will be no more peeing in a bucket. Her blood pressure was fine. She gained 3 pounds but the doctor attributed this to her swelling.

After the OB we drove up the canyon to a great outdoor restaurant for lunch. We had a good time. Lots of laughs and talk about the future. Plus the drive through the canyon was gorgeous!


After lunch we had quite a bit of time left before our next appointment. So, we went to Toys R Us. My cousins baby shower is next weekend so we needed to pick up a few things for gifts. Mostly we went to get Tate a present. Her sister is due in June and I'm sure she's going to have a hard time adjusting to a new baby in the house. I wanted to get her a new baby doll and a carrier for her to take care of her baby when her Momma takes care of Talor. Check out the CUTE travel carrier we got her. She's going to love it!

Next we headed to the hospital for our NST and Ultrasound.

First the NST. Again, all was well. Riley was very active and did everything she needed to. Shelly's blood pressure was great. No contractions, just some uterine irritability. Amniotic Fluid level was 19 which is right in the mid of the normal range. All was good with the NST. At this point we're feeling pretty confident heading into the Ultrasound.

Finally, the Ultrasound. The tech comes in to do her job. The minute she puts the wand on the Hygroma both Shelly and I saw what we didn't want to see. It was much bigger. We asked her to please measure it and it's approximately 1ox10x11 centimeters. On the screen it looks as big as her head, and it is. It's now as big as our sweet little girls head! Shelly starts crying and I stay stoic. The doctor comes in and looks for Hydrops of which there is none. Which is fantastic. He talks to us about the size and not to get caught up in the numbers because we're measuring a 3D object in 2D. Plus the object is soft and pliable. Depending on the angle in which you take the measurement it could be different every time. Great we get that. BUT, we've seen this at least twice a month for four months. We can tell it is much bigger and it sucks. It is SO DAMN HARD TO SEE!!!

The doctor proceeds to tell us things we already know. Riley's doing great. She's almost here. No need for another Ultrasound before she comes because she'll be here soon. They got a measurement and her growth looks to have slowed a bit. She's measuring 5 lbs 14 oz which is right on track. We can't believe she's not bigger than that.

We leave the appointment with Shelly being emotional and me still feeling pretty matter of fact. It is what it is. It won't change whether it is 8 cm or 10 cm. We're still dealing with the same thing and the size doesn't change anything. We get in the truck and neither of us feel like calling anyone to give them an update. I had to at least make on phone call to Mom. Something happened as I was talking to her. I snapped and became so damn angry! I wanted to throw my phone out the front windshield. I was so angry. And then the tears came. Shelly and I didn't say one word to each other the rest of the ride home. She thought I was angry with her. I thought she didn't want to talk. We got home and both cried and cried and cried. We were going through the whys. Why us? Why Riley? We know there are people that go through much worse. But that doesn't make what we're going through any easier.

Luckily my best friend, of over 20 years, Amy, called during my melt down and I let it loose on her. After I'd been ranting and sobbing for about 10 minutes I say, "Wait, you were calling me, what did you want to talk about?" She responds with, "I was just calling to bitch about the gas prices." It was too funny. She can ALWAYS make me laugh. Thank you Amy! I love you!!!

I then got Shelly to come sit outside and watch our four legged girls play with their ball in the back yard. They're so sweet and can always make us laugh.

Today, I'm struggling. Shelly's up and doing well. Not me, I always struggle on Wednesday's. The emotional toll of Tuesday's really takes it out of me. I just want to curl up in bed all day. Shelly's forced me to get up and at least stay in the family room with her and the girls. I'm glad she did because I'm feeling a teensy weensy better. Plus, getting how I'm feeling down on paper is very therapeutic.

I've got a lot of work email to get caught up on today so I'm going to focus on that and keep my mind busy. Tomorrow will be a new day and we'll both feel much better.

Shelly's putting our stroller together right now. It's so dang cool! See picture below. It's got a music system. We simply plug in the IPOD and the speakers funnel music to Riley. Too cool!


And last, but not least, only 17 days to go! Wow!